Published Articles

“Help us find the courage, to make our lives a blessing.”

Healing remains one of the genuine mysteries of life. Throughout history, artists, poets, writers and healers have grappled with the question of what heals. Psychotherapy is a relative newcomer to this quest, for as therapists, ours is the work of healing. Ancient healers speak of creating moments of “spiritual transmission,” where a personal connection to the sacred is a crucial factor in healing. I have, at times, felt privileged to be a participant and witness to extraordinary moments of spiritual connection. Cultivating an appreciation of the healing power of the spiritual is explored in this chapter/piece. Continue reading →

“Dr. Rabinor? Do you remember me?” I hadn’t seen Jenny Brooks (pseudonym) in over 20 years, yet I recognized her immediately when we met serendipitously on a busy Manhattan street corner.

At thirty-six Jenny was an attorney, married with twin daughters. Recently she’d made partner at a prestigious New York Law firm. On a windy April day, we stood on the street corner catching up.

Just last year her father had passed away, she said ruefully. She had “sort of” reconciled with her mother, who now lived in New York again. And her eating disorder was a thing of the past. Continue reading →

My husband unwraps his birthday present. A low gasp escapes as he gazes upon the brass gong. hanging delicately from a hand-carved mahogany stand. Our apartment is small and the gong is enormous. It glints in the June sunlight.

“It is so beautiful,” he says. “How did you find it?” I shrug. He persists. “Where did you get the idea?” he continues, picking up the cloth-covered mallet. He softly touches mallet to brass and a low note reverberates as the gong sways, back and forth and I am reminded of a cold day in February. Continue reading →

Living in New York amidst the flickering memorial candles, flowers, and American flags, ever-present reminders that terrorism continues to lurk, I am touched by a spiritual presence that so often accompanies tragedy. So many of our professional colleagues here and elsewhere have reached out to help those in need. More than ever before, I feel proud to be a therapist. Because stories heal, let me share one of mine. Continue reading →

Recently Laura, a 21-year-old neighbor I’ve known for several years called me and confessed she’d been struggling with an eating disorder. She asked if I thought therapy could make a difference. I assured her that after many decades of working with people with this kind of problem, I know that people can and do recover. She asked for a referral and I gave her the names of three professionals. Before she left, a few more questions came up: How should she decide between the three recommendations? What qualities should she seek? How would she know who was a good match? Continue reading →

-The Talmud

Establishing the trust needed for deep affect work requires that the therapist’s sense of self be engaged…the patient cannot be expected to rapidly open up to a therapist who remains hidden and shielded. The emotional atmosphere should be one in which the patient feels safe and the therapist brave. The patient’s sense of safety within the therapeutic relationship is enhanced in part by the therapist’s risk taking (Fosha, 2000, p.213). Continue reading →

“To save one life is to save the world”
– Inscription on the gift to Otto Shindler

Eating disorders are taking their toll on the Jewish community. Once thought to be a passing fad, anorexia, bulimia, binge eating, excessive exercising and a constant worry about food, fat, calories and weight are here to stay. Why has this happened? And what can we do to understand, prevent, and heal this epidemic? Continue reading →