Archive for 2013

10 Secrets To Befriending Your Ex

By Judith Ruskay Rabinor | Filed in Befriending After Divorce

Much to my chagrin, just six months ago my ex-husband, Arnold Rabinor was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. I was in the process of completing my book, Befriending Your Ex After Divorce: Making Life Better for You, Your Kids and Yes, Your Ex and Arnie and I had frequently joked about going on a book tour together with our current spouses! When he called to share the news of his diagnosis, he ended our conversation on a light note and said, “I guess we’ll have to put off the book tour for now.” Both of us knew that pancreatic cancer was deadly. Neither of us knew that within 10 weeks he would be gone.

My book had not yet gone to print, so I had the opportunity to dedicate it to him. Here is an excerpt I would like to share with you…Click Here for full article..

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Ex Spouses Get a Bad Rap

By Judith Ruskay Rabinor | Filed in Befriending After Divorce

Debunking the stereotypes of the deadbeat ex-husband and the money-grubbing, vindictive ex-wife.

I recently had dinner with three college friends I hadn’t seen in decades, all of us now divorced. Before we knew it, we were talking about our ex-husbands. Ruth casually mentioned she was looking forward to having lunch with her ex-husband. They speak frequently, not only about their two children, now grown, but about old friends and family. Laughingly, she told us they still argue over current events.

Read more at http://goodmenproject.com/marriage-2/ex-spouses-get-a-bad-rap/#tpScPfgufyyQXAMR.99

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A few years ago when I was going through an amicable, uncontested divorce, my friends asked me why it was taking so long. Since we didn’t have children and weren’t using attorneys, they thought the process should be a snap. Well it wasn’t. If you’ve had two plants growing in the same pot for many years the roots as well as the vines will become intertwined. You have two choices: you can dump out the plants and yank them apart, or gently disentangle them so that they will each thrive once they are transplanted in new soil. Separating a couple is no different. When you’ve intertwined your lives for a number of years, let alone a couple of decades, ending it as painlessly as possible is no easy task. Moving a step beyond pain avoidance, it can take some effort to remain friends, but it is well worth it in the long run. You may be asking yourself “If we couldn’t stay married, why in the world would I put any effort into being friends?” There is a new book out by Dr. Judith Ruskay Rabinor that explains why. The book is called Befriending Your Ex after Divorce: Making Life Better for You, Your Kids, and Yes, Your Ex, and I, for one, am thrilled that she’s published it. I recently had the opportunity to interview Dr. Rabinor regarding her new book which was published earlier this month…. Click here for full article.

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